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My Beloved Father
2 min read
I've been suffering through knowing my father has Multiple Myeloma Cancer. I can't do anything but stay strong and break into tears when nobody knows. Its so painful to go on in life without a cop who stuck up for you and is..a father. I am adopted. To lose a loved one like this...is more hurtful than a heartbreak. I've been having trouble sleeping. Nobody understands really. Sometimes I try to talk but I BORE others. I end up crying. Being away from him...hes going to be in Hospital now. Stem cell transplant, bone marrow test, bloodwork, cell freeze treatment, and he will be in isolation. He is going to lose his hair, his whole immune system will be gone. I will not get to visit him again. I cry. He never asked for this. God help me, i pray everyday for him to be the cure. I wish he will survive. I am deeply depressed. I don't know how much longer I can hold in my emotions. Mom's stressed. I don't have a job and my dad is disabled. He lost his job. Hes such a strong man, hes never been sick before. Swear. He's always been healthy. This testing thing, all gonna happen on the same day. That day is this thursday, and he has terminal staged cancer, which cannot be put into remission. He's trying to fight it, but its maknig him weak. He falls into deep sleeps. I cannot explain everything. This is what my stress is built on. I wish my friends would help me.
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HyperFoxyWolf Drawing?
1 min read
I really want my gaia avy drawn in many ways, so if anyone wants to take a step up to my plate, and draw me my cluttered HYPERFOXYWOLF, please go for it, I love having my avy drawn. <3
Here are some ways you can draw HyperFoxyWolf:
1. Me snuggling Hermes Moon (Bunny)
2. Me huggling mochi (puppy on my head)
3. Any other versions ya want. *Free option*
Here are some ways you can draw HyperFoxyWolf:
1. Me snuggling Hermes Moon (Bunny)
2. Me huggling mochi (puppy on my head)
3. Any other versions ya want. *Free option*
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It Ruined My Life
Rocking back and forth I waited in my counseling room. Kristy, my counselor ran out frantically to call the emergency hotline. “Angelica sworn to hurt herself, and she is dead serious, I need an ambulance right away!” I spilled my heart. I was going to commit suicide. Just as my mind filled up with all the bruised memories, everything turned white.
They took me away to a psychotic place. Away from my family, my friends, my life-saving dog. I can’t do this. I can’t take myself anymore! Then the moment had finally arrived. IT popped up like a balloon. Blood splattered all over me, as it had been revealed. I’m eye to eye with a sociopath. Dull blue eyes. His smile crooked like mine. The one, who broke my heart, stood in front of me. That “it” I gave my whole effort to. The tear-jerker who corrupted my soul with every possible turn down you could imagine. He regretted me all along. A tear rolled down my burning cheek. I waited for the memory to fade, to elapse over itself with a replacement. I needed a new miracle. This...It…has ruined my life in such a way I will never forget the pain in which was brought. I couldn’t tell you how much he hurt me, in every way possible. I would rather show you how he took me away from my life, into his. Nothing could ever be more wrong then having let an angel fall so hard she broke.
Every school morning we had; I waited for him, at the torch in the history hall. I would walk beside him everywhere we would go. No matter what happened, I promised I would always be there for him, and I meant it. For my first boyfriend, he was artistic, and fun to be around. Until the months passed by, and I wasn’t blossoming anymore. I was wilting to a black rose of thorns dripping blood all over herself. He wouldn’t hold my hand anymore. He didn’t want my attention any longer. He’d rather watch me get beat up by myself. He laughed. His laughter broke my eardrums, he was a clown. Obsessed with women in a far out different way then you would expect. He USED me, and he was PROUD. Before he was never like that, we were happy together. We were like…MEANT to be or something.
“How are you?” I questioned him.
“JUST STOP. YOUR ALWAYS LIKE THAT.” IT would yell.
“Good morning, my handsome!” I would greet him every day I woke.
“Same to you.” It short talked me out of any conversation.
This entire guy really wanted…was unbelievable in my mind. I was against what he wanted from me. I didn’t believe in it. He took it from me the first damn day I went over to his house. It sucked. The most stupid thing made on Earth? The atheist who hurts angels like me.
“ANGELICA, OPEN YOUR EYES!” Who was that I thought?
My vision was blurred. My eyes started creeping open, and I saw a bright fluorescent light in my view.
“ANGELICA?! Are you awake? Can you understand me? Answer if you can hear me!” A voice shuddered next to my ear. I shifted myself on the hospital bed, yet couldn’t move my hands, or feet, they were strapped to the bed. I was all tied up in a way I couldn’t even touch myself in a way to harm. There were clear cords hooked up on my forehead, and I felt dizzy. I couldn’t even scratch the itching sensation of a mosquito bite pin pressure in my right arm, between the muscle and the forearm. I had an I.V.
“Hun, she’s still out of it, let her rest for now, you can check back later...” The words got fuzzy like a radio tuned out of it’s station. A nurse walked away with a little girl. I fell asleep again, to weak to get up or say anything.
6 hours later, I woke and heard screaming from down the hall. I jerked my arm, trying to sit up, yet couldn’t move. I looked around, for something sharp to cut the straps off with. I saw the end table next to me, and on it rested a present box, and a card. A nurse walked by in sea foam green uniform on, and I yelled for her. She glanced over, and took a clipboard hanging from a nail on the wall near my room, and stepped in.
“I need out of the straps, I want to open my gift right now.” I wasn’t feeling very good, and neither was I showing any improvement. Happiness was all lost within my veins.
“Okay, sure thing, just give me a moment please…Angel...” she paused cruising her eyes on the clipboard with paper on it…“ah, Angelica!” She finished my name, and then set the clipboard down. She glanced up at me, and I gave her a fake smile. More of a smirk if you ask me, ha.
As she loosened the thick massive Velcro straps, I regained a pulse down where the circulation was cut off. I then sat up, and released a sigh. I stared at the present in which the nurse sat in my lap. I put my hands on it, and felt the bow on top. I recognize this wrapping style! I ripped the corner edge of wrapping paper off, and tore the rest off. Inside was a box. I asked for a box opener. I almost hesitated.
“I need a box opener,” I thought before I spoke. I can’t say anything dangerous like KNIFE, or BLADE. She would think I’m coo-coo. “Or may I ask you to open it for me, please? My hands are weak.” She nodded, and courteously helped me get the tape off, and inside was a plush bunny rabbit stuffed animal. She handed it too me, and smiled.
“Aw, Looks like you got yourself a loving friend. Now you have a sleeping buddy! How adorable.” I held the rabbit in my hands. My eyes started to water. I squeezed the heartless stuffed thing onto my chest, and let out a cry. The nurse gently pat me on the back, and hugged me. My long blonde hair covered my face, and I couldn’t see anything from my blurred rainy vision, like I need windshield wipers. The rabbit soaked in my tears, and my eyes dried. I started giggling, and the giggling turned into unnecessary hysterical laughing. Everything soon turned white again, and I shut my eyes like a window being quietly closed for the night. I felt myself being pushed lightly into a cloud of dreams. And the nightmares, that tucked me in that dreadful night.
Smothered, kicked in the ass, picked up and strangled. I was forced to be with him. I felt like I had a part of him inside me. I felt like he was me, in a way of human nature. I accepted him for who he was, and that included his bipolar. I couldn’t help myself. He needed me. He deserved all the pleasure of a gifted talent who’d never break a soul. I happened to be too good for him. That’s why I don’t get him. I gave him all my love anyway. Why should I matter, I’m useless to him. That’s okay. I recycled a piece of trash. Now IT got dug out by a preppy fake girl. That’s okay I guess life wasn’t meant for the angel like me. It’s all good. No sweat.
She was a preppy bitch. She was fake. She presented herself to him just from lack of respect. She didn’t want him, she didn’t like him; she NEEDED a STATUS for herself, because EVERYTHING was ABOUT her. She just wanted him so she could have the say in “Oh, look-y at me, I have a boyfriend, and you don’t, AHAHAH!” She hates his guts, like the pig she was. A cake with layers. A caterpillar that turned into a pudgy moth. She told him she doesn’t feel like making out with him. What’s wrong with these two, aren’t they perfectly wrong together? Why was I kicked out of a life that brought me wishes that came true? Did God do this on purpose? Was it an accident God brought to me, and took away instead? Why me? I cried myself awake.
“BLOOD!” A nurse hollered. I had ripped my I.V. out of my arm, scratching it off.
“HELLO, I NEED HELP OVER HERE, DAMNIT, HELP ME DANIELLE!” Another nurse came pouring in like a raging storm of anger, and ripped the tag off of my forehead, and took me by the back, Wrapped a tight belted vest thing on me, and through my arms. She grabbed by a strap I guess on my back. I had no idea what I was wearing, because from the time I held the bunny, to this freaky jacket that crossed my arms over me, I felt like a retard. I didn’t understand what I did wrong. All I did was scratch my itch. Ha…I started getting emotional as this mean nurse lady pushed and yanked me out of the room.
“YOU BETTER LISTEN MISS ANGELICA,” She spit in my face. I could already tell I wasn’t gonna like her. I reached my shoulder and wiped the saliva off my mouth and chin. Then stared down at the ground. I was so damn depressed with myself.
I wasn’t paying attention to a word this lady said, I just started to think of other things. Boats and birds, that song…Living to make one free…bunnies…IT… I started to cry, and fell to my knees.
“ANGELICA, GET UP, STOP GOOFING AROUND.” This lady started to get on my nerves. I jerked away from her, and she pulled my hair, and I screeched. A chunk was torn out. My scalp burned. All I could see was the steel door the no window in the direction I was pointed. The nurse opened the door, and shoved me in a room. I fell to the floor, I couldn’t move my arms. I wanted to throw a temper tantrum, and so I did.
“ALL I EVER WANTED WAS AN ANSWER!” I kept screaming to nobody but myself. I started to bite my lip. I opened my eyes, and saw all this room was is a colossal PILLOW. I bounced my head on the walls, and screamed. I wanted to die. I got dizzy, and my ears bled. I wanted to kill myself. I couldn’t do anything in this stupid empty SAFE ROOM. Time for a different tactic. Plan B. I stomped my feet so hard that my legs gave out, and I fell to the ground. I coughed up filthy mucus. It smelled like burning rubber, and B.O. I was sweating into a frantic mess. I was scared. I pissed myself, and started my period. I struggled to get free of this hot bloody jacket of some sort. It bound to me like some big ass python. How much more hell do I get?! I tire myself, and ended up with a crucial amount of pain within my forehead. I couldn’t breathe. I was exhausted. I didn’t remember who I was. What I used to be. It had all been taken away, by the Ex who made me…ME. A smoke started clearing OUT my vision in the room, and it smelled so strong I felt nauseated. I leaned down my head thrown back ready to be slit. I just…got put to sleep.
“Angelica, I will always be your man, and you will always be my Angelica…” He would sweet talk me. “We will be in rocking chairs, holding hands, and together die in the same grave. I will never leave you.” I cried.
“I will forever remember you, I will never regret the things we’ve done, and will always love you in some way.” I would say in my heart. I could barely make eye contact with this dude anymore; I couldn’t take his rudeness, so I would fall asleep. I was just tired of it. Besides, he never wanted to do anything my way. I never nagged him for any of his flaws. I always complimented him, and gave him my best behavior as a true girlfriend. I failed. Yet he epic failed. How can I move on in life, with IT as a reminder in my heart, he was my first! And get this, I still own everything he once made for me, and gifted to me. I kept it all, and still have it tucked away hidden in some forgotten shelter.
I woke up paralyzed in my straitjacket, and sighed deeply. There was duck tape on my mouth. I guess screaming every curse word and losing my voice was not allowed in this manor of crazy idiots. I popped my ears blowing air through my ears harshly. I was miserable. My eyes were sore from the non-stop crying. A nurse came in, not the same lady I encountered before; who had a spiteful attitude. I read her nametag: “Hi, my name is Andrea” I read in my head. I looked up at her, but her eyes avoided mine. She unlocked the door, and led me out; I was very cooperative with her, walking with smooth strokes. I started daydreaming like I usually had. About him, that is...
One day he left me in his basement workshop. It wasn’t fun. I was helping him with chiseling wood, and I don’t know why exactly, it’s something he wanted to do, so I learned from him teaching me. Apparently I wasn’t doing it right, and he got mad, and threw his hammer on the floor, and stormed out of the room. He even slammed the door, which locks from the outside. I guess his bipolar snapped, because I really didn’t mean to get him upset. I waited for 5 minutes, and checked my cell phone, and heard footsteps outside the door. I was locked in, so I couldn’t get out, and then my boyfriend unlocked the door, and left again. I quietly picked myself up from the cold dirty cement floor, and sneaked out of the room. I saw my boyfriend on his computer, listening to some sad music with a video. Awkward I thought. Then he turned around, and I gave him a wait one moment finger. I headed upstairs. He rushed after me, worried I was going to leave.
“ARE YOU LEAVING?!” He shouted from the base step. All I cared for was my medication, and to find myself alone again. I wasn’t expecting him to do that to me in any case. “No, I was just getting my medication…I’m late on taking them.” I sighed and reached the top of the steps, and walked around a hall, too the front door where my black book-bag sat waiting for me. Unzipped the small pack, and got the orange safety cap bottle out with my name on it.
He walked off again, and this time he went outside the house, into the woods somewhere out behind the house, close to a park. I don’t know what seemed to trouble him, and why he was so sudden in the mood change. It boggled my mind by the very sight of witnessing him doing it to me! I was picking up on something, noticing he had an issue of some sort. About 8 minutes later, having been concerned; his younger sister got home from school, and greeted me. She was pleased to see me.
“Wait, where’s my brother?” She asked confused, and looked around. “Is he hiding?” I looked down at her. I shook my skull.
“I don’t know, he kind of left me waiting here, he seemed annoyed all of a sudden, and slammed a door on me, I don’t understand why…” I shrugged looking at her.
“Oh, he does that a lot.” She whispered to me with her hand near her mouth.
“He is bipolar, and can be happy one second, then cry over nothing the next!” She look puzzled, “At least that’s what mom told me.” Then she nodded with contentment.
“Bipolar, was he born with that?” I asked not knowing how rude it was. The little girl shook her head yes, and took me by the hand.
“COMON, WE WILL FIND HIM!” Eager with me being at her side, we set off on a little risky adventure to hunt for my lover.
I spaced out, and when I opened my eyes, I saw myself waiting in the room in which I was assigned to. I heard voices coming from the hallway outside, and other kids my age shouting in their rooms. The whole situation is crazy. I don’t belong here. I’m not one to be in the bad situation. I couldn’t even remember who I was on the inside. Who I; Angelica was before she ever met this first boyfriend, this…IT. I’m mentally broken somehow. Why couldn’t I feel happy, and be the joyful little sweet Angelica I used to be? What happened to me? I’m turning into a suicidal maniac. Did HE do this to me? I stopped thinking, and went into a strange catatonic frenzy. I just sat there, in my room, on a single sized white cover bed. I couldn’t feel anything moving in my thoughts. Nothing seemed to come in contact between me, and my brick wall. I hid myself from the real world. Imagination was about to explode in any second. Then it hit me. He imploded like chemistry we had in my mind. All I could think of was HIM.
“Angelica, you ready for therapy? You’re in a session.” Mrs. Andrea told me. She was very young. She’s youngest of all nurses at this complex. She is my favorite, if I am allowed to have any. It’s been a week and a half now, and the time spent was worthwhile. I am still healing from my past relationship downfall though, so I still need the help. Plus, the depression and anxiety hasn’t left my emotional state. “Yea, I’m ready.” I answered.
She then got my favorite snack out, a butter-finger chocolate bar. I smiled, and accepted it. Then I headed out of the room with her.
Andrea has short black hair, and chocolate brown eyes, like mine. She is petite and very polite to everyone at the therapy sessions. The best part of all, she was my nurse. She gave me permission to get out of my bed each night just to get myself a drink of water, and fresh air. I was allowed to walk down towards the therapy pets sector, and watch the animals comfort their humans. It made me happy to feel the presence of animals in this weird place. It sort of reminded me of a hospital though. I believe where I was at the time was very similar to one too. When I was finished with the animal observations, I’d have to sneak back into my room, when everyone else in the building I was at, was sound asleep. Thank God, for Andrea in my life. She means a lot to me in my life threatening situations. She drags me through my problems.
She took me too a smaller room for therapy today. I couldn’t take immense spaces in the midst of tons of people; I get paranoid like that, traumatized. Overwhelmed with 4 people in the room besides me, I saw a poster on the dry wall. It had a dwarf hotot rabbit on it. I focused on that poster throughout the hearing of my instructor.
“Angelica, would you like to go first?” The instructor questioned me. I was not paying attention, and had to snap myself out of my distraction.
“No, sorry I wasn’t listening what just happened? I’m sorry...” I replied in a stuttered way. I was afraid to get yelled at, but mark my words, I wasn’t prepared either!
“Okay, then can you please stand by me, and face the rest of the class?” She said. I was chili pepper red in the face. Too embarrassed to budge, I became stubborn, and just stood there, unable to move. I covered my face, feeling the glared stares strike me like spotlights on a stage.
“Here we have a perfect illustration...” She went on, talking about me, and I got upset. The disturbance was unnecessary, and too offensive for me to handle. Nobody’s supposed to be perfect. I was a Nobody, and I guess nobody is perfect. Suits me well, I hated myself at this point. I really didn’t want to be here. Not today. Please God, make it all go away! I prayed as I tried to hold back my tears, but they ran down my face, like water peeping through cracks in a dam. I couldn’t stop thinking of the love I felt entirely lost. Taken away. I couldn’t love myself. At the second I sobbed out loud, Andrea, found me, and took me away; too have some girl to girl talk. At least someone understood my pain.
“What’s been bothering you so much? I thought you were over this…boy.” She told me in an unruffled voice. I looked at her. She saw it through my eyes. She knew why I was hurt this bad. Why I dared to hurt myself in a serious way I had the chance to do one day.
“You know what Angelica, that boy wasn’t worth it. He used you, you fell down, and he didn’t pick you up. He went to search for another girl, because he didn’t believe in a pure innocent angel like you. Why would you let a little low turn down like him be given the chance with you? You deserve so much better, you weren’t treated right.” I listened to her every word come out of her parenting mouth. Yet my throat was all choked up and tied in the sweat and tears I couldn’t do anything but cough a cry. It hurt to even think of HIM.
“He might have dumped you, but did you really love him with all the bits and pieces he shattered you with? Was he really worth dying for?” She persuaded me.
“He belittled you, outsmarted you, and nagged your every flaw. He disguised you behind his efforts to betray you, don’t you remember?” Andrea said. “You are a good person Angelica.” I finally stopped crying. The moment my tears dripped to the floor, I realized I was not all that happy with him. He absolutely hurt me, shattered my heart like glass, letting the wine spill. I put up with it all for too long. I needed to move on. You can do this Angelica, I thought. I knew I could make it through. I felt stronger. I stepped forward, and put my foot down on the fact. I am better then HIM, and I deserve to be treated with respect.
“Yes Angelica! You are getting the hang of this, I’m so proud of you!” Andrea praised me with joy. I felt a spark of happiness elude inside me. I felt my heart pounding. One step further down that highway to live back home! YAY!
A few days after my recovery, I returned to education. Summer School had begun, so I enrolled a class. Digital Photography was open, and seemed interesting, so I signed up for that. I imagined myself sitting in a boring class, with no friends, and having to deal with HIM. I worried myself a lot nowadays. I stayed with my counselor, Mrs. Kristy to, and had the occasional visits each week to let her know what’s going on and how I’m doing. During Summer school, I did fine, and even made new friends. He left me alone, and all went fine. No more straitjacket psycho for me. And so I set out on a new journey, opened a new chapter, and flipped my days. I had a new brilliant life change ahead of me, and nobody could tell me what to do. Angelica is in control of her own actions, and how she reacts to them. GO ME!
Rocking back and forth I waited in my counseling room. Kristy, my counselor ran out frantically to call the emergency hotline. “Angelica sworn to hurt herself, and she is dead serious, I need an ambulance right away!” I spilled my heart. I was going to commit suicide. Just as my mind filled up with all the bruised memories, everything turned white.
They took me away to a psychotic place. Away from my family, my friends, my life-saving dog. I can’t do this. I can’t take myself anymore! Then the moment had finally arrived. IT popped up like a balloon. Blood splattered all over me, as it had been revealed. I’m eye to eye with a sociopath. Dull blue eyes. His smile crooked like mine. The one, who broke my heart, stood in front of me. That “it” I gave my whole effort to. The tear-jerker who corrupted my soul with every possible turn down you could imagine. He regretted me all along. A tear rolled down my burning cheek. I waited for the memory to fade, to elapse over itself with a replacement. I needed a new miracle. This...It…has ruined my life in such a way I will never forget the pain in which was brought. I couldn’t tell you how much he hurt me, in every way possible. I would rather show you how he took me away from my life, into his. Nothing could ever be more wrong then having let an angel fall so hard she broke.
Every school morning we had; I waited for him, at the torch in the history hall. I would walk beside him everywhere we would go. No matter what happened, I promised I would always be there for him, and I meant it. For my first boyfriend, he was artistic, and fun to be around. Until the months passed by, and I wasn’t blossoming anymore. I was wilting to a black rose of thorns dripping blood all over herself. He wouldn’t hold my hand anymore. He didn’t want my attention any longer. He’d rather watch me get beat up by myself. He laughed. His laughter broke my eardrums, he was a clown. Obsessed with women in a far out different way then you would expect. He USED me, and he was PROUD. Before he was never like that, we were happy together. We were like…MEANT to be or something.
“How are you?” I questioned him.
“JUST STOP. YOUR ALWAYS LIKE THAT.” IT would yell.
“Good morning, my handsome!” I would greet him every day I woke.
“Same to you.” It short talked me out of any conversation.
This entire guy really wanted…was unbelievable in my mind. I was against what he wanted from me. I didn’t believe in it. He took it from me the first damn day I went over to his house. It sucked. The most stupid thing made on Earth? The atheist who hurts angels like me.
“ANGELICA, OPEN YOUR EYES!” Who was that I thought?
My vision was blurred. My eyes started creeping open, and I saw a bright fluorescent light in my view.
“ANGELICA?! Are you awake? Can you understand me? Answer if you can hear me!” A voice shuddered next to my ear. I shifted myself on the hospital bed, yet couldn’t move my hands, or feet, they were strapped to the bed. I was all tied up in a way I couldn’t even touch myself in a way to harm. There were clear cords hooked up on my forehead, and I felt dizzy. I couldn’t even scratch the itching sensation of a mosquito bite pin pressure in my right arm, between the muscle and the forearm. I had an I.V.
“Hun, she’s still out of it, let her rest for now, you can check back later...” The words got fuzzy like a radio tuned out of it’s station. A nurse walked away with a little girl. I fell asleep again, to weak to get up or say anything.
6 hours later, I woke and heard screaming from down the hall. I jerked my arm, trying to sit up, yet couldn’t move. I looked around, for something sharp to cut the straps off with. I saw the end table next to me, and on it rested a present box, and a card. A nurse walked by in sea foam green uniform on, and I yelled for her. She glanced over, and took a clipboard hanging from a nail on the wall near my room, and stepped in.
“I need out of the straps, I want to open my gift right now.” I wasn’t feeling very good, and neither was I showing any improvement. Happiness was all lost within my veins.
“Okay, sure thing, just give me a moment please…Angel...” she paused cruising her eyes on the clipboard with paper on it…“ah, Angelica!” She finished my name, and then set the clipboard down. She glanced up at me, and I gave her a fake smile. More of a smirk if you ask me, ha.
As she loosened the thick massive Velcro straps, I regained a pulse down where the circulation was cut off. I then sat up, and released a sigh. I stared at the present in which the nurse sat in my lap. I put my hands on it, and felt the bow on top. I recognize this wrapping style! I ripped the corner edge of wrapping paper off, and tore the rest off. Inside was a box. I asked for a box opener. I almost hesitated.
“I need a box opener,” I thought before I spoke. I can’t say anything dangerous like KNIFE, or BLADE. She would think I’m coo-coo. “Or may I ask you to open it for me, please? My hands are weak.” She nodded, and courteously helped me get the tape off, and inside was a plush bunny rabbit stuffed animal. She handed it too me, and smiled.
“Aw, Looks like you got yourself a loving friend. Now you have a sleeping buddy! How adorable.” I held the rabbit in my hands. My eyes started to water. I squeezed the heartless stuffed thing onto my chest, and let out a cry. The nurse gently pat me on the back, and hugged me. My long blonde hair covered my face, and I couldn’t see anything from my blurred rainy vision, like I need windshield wipers. The rabbit soaked in my tears, and my eyes dried. I started giggling, and the giggling turned into unnecessary hysterical laughing. Everything soon turned white again, and I shut my eyes like a window being quietly closed for the night. I felt myself being pushed lightly into a cloud of dreams. And the nightmares, that tucked me in that dreadful night.
Smothered, kicked in the ass, picked up and strangled. I was forced to be with him. I felt like I had a part of him inside me. I felt like he was me, in a way of human nature. I accepted him for who he was, and that included his bipolar. I couldn’t help myself. He needed me. He deserved all the pleasure of a gifted talent who’d never break a soul. I happened to be too good for him. That’s why I don’t get him. I gave him all my love anyway. Why should I matter, I’m useless to him. That’s okay. I recycled a piece of trash. Now IT got dug out by a preppy fake girl. That’s okay I guess life wasn’t meant for the angel like me. It’s all good. No sweat.
She was a preppy bitch. She was fake. She presented herself to him just from lack of respect. She didn’t want him, she didn’t like him; she NEEDED a STATUS for herself, because EVERYTHING was ABOUT her. She just wanted him so she could have the say in “Oh, look-y at me, I have a boyfriend, and you don’t, AHAHAH!” She hates his guts, like the pig she was. A cake with layers. A caterpillar that turned into a pudgy moth. She told him she doesn’t feel like making out with him. What’s wrong with these two, aren’t they perfectly wrong together? Why was I kicked out of a life that brought me wishes that came true? Did God do this on purpose? Was it an accident God brought to me, and took away instead? Why me? I cried myself awake.
“BLOOD!” A nurse hollered. I had ripped my I.V. out of my arm, scratching it off.
“HELLO, I NEED HELP OVER HERE, DAMNIT, HELP ME DANIELLE!” Another nurse came pouring in like a raging storm of anger, and ripped the tag off of my forehead, and took me by the back, Wrapped a tight belted vest thing on me, and through my arms. She grabbed by a strap I guess on my back. I had no idea what I was wearing, because from the time I held the bunny, to this freaky jacket that crossed my arms over me, I felt like a retard. I didn’t understand what I did wrong. All I did was scratch my itch. Ha…I started getting emotional as this mean nurse lady pushed and yanked me out of the room.
“YOU BETTER LISTEN MISS ANGELICA,” She spit in my face. I could already tell I wasn’t gonna like her. I reached my shoulder and wiped the saliva off my mouth and chin. Then stared down at the ground. I was so damn depressed with myself.
I wasn’t paying attention to a word this lady said, I just started to think of other things. Boats and birds, that song…Living to make one free…bunnies…IT… I started to cry, and fell to my knees.
“ANGELICA, GET UP, STOP GOOFING AROUND.” This lady started to get on my nerves. I jerked away from her, and she pulled my hair, and I screeched. A chunk was torn out. My scalp burned. All I could see was the steel door the no window in the direction I was pointed. The nurse opened the door, and shoved me in a room. I fell to the floor, I couldn’t move my arms. I wanted to throw a temper tantrum, and so I did.
“ALL I EVER WANTED WAS AN ANSWER!” I kept screaming to nobody but myself. I started to bite my lip. I opened my eyes, and saw all this room was is a colossal PILLOW. I bounced my head on the walls, and screamed. I wanted to die. I got dizzy, and my ears bled. I wanted to kill myself. I couldn’t do anything in this stupid empty SAFE ROOM. Time for a different tactic. Plan B. I stomped my feet so hard that my legs gave out, and I fell to the ground. I coughed up filthy mucus. It smelled like burning rubber, and B.O. I was sweating into a frantic mess. I was scared. I pissed myself, and started my period. I struggled to get free of this hot bloody jacket of some sort. It bound to me like some big ass python. How much more hell do I get?! I tire myself, and ended up with a crucial amount of pain within my forehead. I couldn’t breathe. I was exhausted. I didn’t remember who I was. What I used to be. It had all been taken away, by the Ex who made me…ME. A smoke started clearing OUT my vision in the room, and it smelled so strong I felt nauseated. I leaned down my head thrown back ready to be slit. I just…got put to sleep.
“Angelica, I will always be your man, and you will always be my Angelica…” He would sweet talk me. “We will be in rocking chairs, holding hands, and together die in the same grave. I will never leave you.” I cried.
“I will forever remember you, I will never regret the things we’ve done, and will always love you in some way.” I would say in my heart. I could barely make eye contact with this dude anymore; I couldn’t take his rudeness, so I would fall asleep. I was just tired of it. Besides, he never wanted to do anything my way. I never nagged him for any of his flaws. I always complimented him, and gave him my best behavior as a true girlfriend. I failed. Yet he epic failed. How can I move on in life, with IT as a reminder in my heart, he was my first! And get this, I still own everything he once made for me, and gifted to me. I kept it all, and still have it tucked away hidden in some forgotten shelter.
I woke up paralyzed in my straitjacket, and sighed deeply. There was duck tape on my mouth. I guess screaming every curse word and losing my voice was not allowed in this manor of crazy idiots. I popped my ears blowing air through my ears harshly. I was miserable. My eyes were sore from the non-stop crying. A nurse came in, not the same lady I encountered before; who had a spiteful attitude. I read her nametag: “Hi, my name is Andrea” I read in my head. I looked up at her, but her eyes avoided mine. She unlocked the door, and led me out; I was very cooperative with her, walking with smooth strokes. I started daydreaming like I usually had. About him, that is...
One day he left me in his basement workshop. It wasn’t fun. I was helping him with chiseling wood, and I don’t know why exactly, it’s something he wanted to do, so I learned from him teaching me. Apparently I wasn’t doing it right, and he got mad, and threw his hammer on the floor, and stormed out of the room. He even slammed the door, which locks from the outside. I guess his bipolar snapped, because I really didn’t mean to get him upset. I waited for 5 minutes, and checked my cell phone, and heard footsteps outside the door. I was locked in, so I couldn’t get out, and then my boyfriend unlocked the door, and left again. I quietly picked myself up from the cold dirty cement floor, and sneaked out of the room. I saw my boyfriend on his computer, listening to some sad music with a video. Awkward I thought. Then he turned around, and I gave him a wait one moment finger. I headed upstairs. He rushed after me, worried I was going to leave.
“ARE YOU LEAVING?!” He shouted from the base step. All I cared for was my medication, and to find myself alone again. I wasn’t expecting him to do that to me in any case. “No, I was just getting my medication…I’m late on taking them.” I sighed and reached the top of the steps, and walked around a hall, too the front door where my black book-bag sat waiting for me. Unzipped the small pack, and got the orange safety cap bottle out with my name on it.
He walked off again, and this time he went outside the house, into the woods somewhere out behind the house, close to a park. I don’t know what seemed to trouble him, and why he was so sudden in the mood change. It boggled my mind by the very sight of witnessing him doing it to me! I was picking up on something, noticing he had an issue of some sort. About 8 minutes later, having been concerned; his younger sister got home from school, and greeted me. She was pleased to see me.
“Wait, where’s my brother?” She asked confused, and looked around. “Is he hiding?” I looked down at her. I shook my skull.
“I don’t know, he kind of left me waiting here, he seemed annoyed all of a sudden, and slammed a door on me, I don’t understand why…” I shrugged looking at her.
“Oh, he does that a lot.” She whispered to me with her hand near her mouth.
“He is bipolar, and can be happy one second, then cry over nothing the next!” She look puzzled, “At least that’s what mom told me.” Then she nodded with contentment.
“Bipolar, was he born with that?” I asked not knowing how rude it was. The little girl shook her head yes, and took me by the hand.
“COMON, WE WILL FIND HIM!” Eager with me being at her side, we set off on a little risky adventure to hunt for my lover.
I spaced out, and when I opened my eyes, I saw myself waiting in the room in which I was assigned to. I heard voices coming from the hallway outside, and other kids my age shouting in their rooms. The whole situation is crazy. I don’t belong here. I’m not one to be in the bad situation. I couldn’t even remember who I was on the inside. Who I; Angelica was before she ever met this first boyfriend, this…IT. I’m mentally broken somehow. Why couldn’t I feel happy, and be the joyful little sweet Angelica I used to be? What happened to me? I’m turning into a suicidal maniac. Did HE do this to me? I stopped thinking, and went into a strange catatonic frenzy. I just sat there, in my room, on a single sized white cover bed. I couldn’t feel anything moving in my thoughts. Nothing seemed to come in contact between me, and my brick wall. I hid myself from the real world. Imagination was about to explode in any second. Then it hit me. He imploded like chemistry we had in my mind. All I could think of was HIM.
“Angelica, you ready for therapy? You’re in a session.” Mrs. Andrea told me. She was very young. She’s youngest of all nurses at this complex. She is my favorite, if I am allowed to have any. It’s been a week and a half now, and the time spent was worthwhile. I am still healing from my past relationship downfall though, so I still need the help. Plus, the depression and anxiety hasn’t left my emotional state. “Yea, I’m ready.” I answered.
She then got my favorite snack out, a butter-finger chocolate bar. I smiled, and accepted it. Then I headed out of the room with her.
Andrea has short black hair, and chocolate brown eyes, like mine. She is petite and very polite to everyone at the therapy sessions. The best part of all, she was my nurse. She gave me permission to get out of my bed each night just to get myself a drink of water, and fresh air. I was allowed to walk down towards the therapy pets sector, and watch the animals comfort their humans. It made me happy to feel the presence of animals in this weird place. It sort of reminded me of a hospital though. I believe where I was at the time was very similar to one too. When I was finished with the animal observations, I’d have to sneak back into my room, when everyone else in the building I was at, was sound asleep. Thank God, for Andrea in my life. She means a lot to me in my life threatening situations. She drags me through my problems.
She took me too a smaller room for therapy today. I couldn’t take immense spaces in the midst of tons of people; I get paranoid like that, traumatized. Overwhelmed with 4 people in the room besides me, I saw a poster on the dry wall. It had a dwarf hotot rabbit on it. I focused on that poster throughout the hearing of my instructor.
“Angelica, would you like to go first?” The instructor questioned me. I was not paying attention, and had to snap myself out of my distraction.
“No, sorry I wasn’t listening what just happened? I’m sorry...” I replied in a stuttered way. I was afraid to get yelled at, but mark my words, I wasn’t prepared either!
“Okay, then can you please stand by me, and face the rest of the class?” She said. I was chili pepper red in the face. Too embarrassed to budge, I became stubborn, and just stood there, unable to move. I covered my face, feeling the glared stares strike me like spotlights on a stage.
“Here we have a perfect illustration...” She went on, talking about me, and I got upset. The disturbance was unnecessary, and too offensive for me to handle. Nobody’s supposed to be perfect. I was a Nobody, and I guess nobody is perfect. Suits me well, I hated myself at this point. I really didn’t want to be here. Not today. Please God, make it all go away! I prayed as I tried to hold back my tears, but they ran down my face, like water peeping through cracks in a dam. I couldn’t stop thinking of the love I felt entirely lost. Taken away. I couldn’t love myself. At the second I sobbed out loud, Andrea, found me, and took me away; too have some girl to girl talk. At least someone understood my pain.
“What’s been bothering you so much? I thought you were over this…boy.” She told me in an unruffled voice. I looked at her. She saw it through my eyes. She knew why I was hurt this bad. Why I dared to hurt myself in a serious way I had the chance to do one day.
“You know what Angelica, that boy wasn’t worth it. He used you, you fell down, and he didn’t pick you up. He went to search for another girl, because he didn’t believe in a pure innocent angel like you. Why would you let a little low turn down like him be given the chance with you? You deserve so much better, you weren’t treated right.” I listened to her every word come out of her parenting mouth. Yet my throat was all choked up and tied in the sweat and tears I couldn’t do anything but cough a cry. It hurt to even think of HIM.
“He might have dumped you, but did you really love him with all the bits and pieces he shattered you with? Was he really worth dying for?” She persuaded me.
“He belittled you, outsmarted you, and nagged your every flaw. He disguised you behind his efforts to betray you, don’t you remember?” Andrea said. “You are a good person Angelica.” I finally stopped crying. The moment my tears dripped to the floor, I realized I was not all that happy with him. He absolutely hurt me, shattered my heart like glass, letting the wine spill. I put up with it all for too long. I needed to move on. You can do this Angelica, I thought. I knew I could make it through. I felt stronger. I stepped forward, and put my foot down on the fact. I am better then HIM, and I deserve to be treated with respect.
“Yes Angelica! You are getting the hang of this, I’m so proud of you!” Andrea praised me with joy. I felt a spark of happiness elude inside me. I felt my heart pounding. One step further down that highway to live back home! YAY!
A few days after my recovery, I returned to education. Summer School had begun, so I enrolled a class. Digital Photography was open, and seemed interesting, so I signed up for that. I imagined myself sitting in a boring class, with no friends, and having to deal with HIM. I worried myself a lot nowadays. I stayed with my counselor, Mrs. Kristy to, and had the occasional visits each week to let her know what’s going on and how I’m doing. During Summer school, I did fine, and even made new friends. He left me alone, and all went fine. No more straitjacket psycho for me. And so I set out on a new journey, opened a new chapter, and flipped my days. I had a new brilliant life change ahead of me, and nobody could tell me what to do. Angelica is in control of her own actions, and how she reacts to them. GO ME!
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HyperFoxyWolf Drawings?
1 min read
I really want my gaia avy drawn in many ways, so if anyone wants to take a step up to my plate, and draw me my cluttered HYPERFOXYWOLF, please go for it, I love having my avy drawn. <3
Here are some ways you can draw HyperFoxyWolf:
1. Me snuggling Hermes Moon (Bunny)
2. Me huggling mochi (puppy on my head)
3. Any other versions ya want. *Free option*
Here are some ways you can draw HyperFoxyWolf:
1. Me snuggling Hermes Moon (Bunny)
2. Me huggling mochi (puppy on my head)
3. Any other versions ya want. *Free option*
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Six Flags Day Trip!!! !
12 min read
So I went to Six Flags, with my best friend Andrea Browning, and my Best Friend Forever Casey Sain. We were with my parents, my brother, who brought his friend along, and on Casey's side, brought his parents, and sister-who brought her own friend too. I was so happy and excited, I could barely sleep the night before this day occured!
Okay, so when we arrived there, Casey calls me, and is all like, where are you? I told him we were coming, he told me too look for a guy with a black shirt on, 5'11, and short brown hair. I said okay, and we hung up. I was looknig for him, and I looked right in front of me at the gates, and there he was in front of the fountain, waving straight at me, and I was like OMG, THAT's HIM! I was so happy too see him, it gave me funny feelings inside. Anyway , I get through, and Kc runs up beside me, and some guy wants to take our picture, so we let him, then we take a few for ourselves. I was so happy. I went over to see his family, and greeted them, my parents fine with the whole thing. The next thing that happened? Well, rides of course. xD
First ride we rode on was Batman. I sat in between KC and Andrea. So we had a blast on this ride. I found two pennies. I stuck my gum on the dull one, and added it to the gum board before we got on the ride. So much fun..next thing we all rode was the ninja. Kc rode in thr front passenger car, alone, while Andrea and I rode in the one behind him. We were in the first car. I was excited, yet knew my ears were going to be beaten up in this ride. xD before this ride happenned, Kc pointed out a guy that looked like Albert Einsten, and told me not to look to the right, and I looked to the right, and OMG a lady had sweaty boobs. xD I turned away, and was like, WOAH DAMN , and he told me, I told you not too look! xD I had so much fun, kc made me laugh so hard. During the time being at six flags. Time started flying by. With the long waiting lines.
Soon it got extremely sunny, and hot, yet the breeze was still going. I met up with kc's sister Jamie, and her friend. They seemed very kind. Not as bad as some other people I've met. I liked kc's family. They cared about me just as much as I cared bout them. Anyway, we all took some pictures, and decided on lunch. 1:30? sure. So we all agreed. Kc got his map out and we looked at the rides we could go on next. He wanted to ride the big white one, and I told him that's the Screaming Eagle. He was full of energy. So off we went, towards the screaming eagle.
He was being himself. I was open with him. I felt as if he knew what I gone through. We shared stories together, and he made me laugh easily. The way he looked at me, we could lock eyes. I was way too happy to be like this. It was more then I could ask for, a friend, for my birthday wish. A person who'd be there. A soul-mate just meant for me. I was happy it came true. He pointed out the misty spray thingy, and said MISTY THINGY! I thought the same thing. We raced over to it, and took a drink outta it, and then lost interest, and walked up the stairs leading to the Screaming Eagle. He yelled hi to people here and there, and I did the same. I loved his humor. I understood him, and he understood me. We changed the subjct a lot together, and had a conversation of changing subjects! Randomness rules, lol.
This time Andrea and I sat it the front. yet still in the first car. How lucky we were. Kc sat behind me, and poked my head, I couldn't reach back at him, darn revenge! xD The ride starts, and I looked back at kc, and he told me he had asthma. I felt worried. I told him my brother has it too, and asked if he'd be allright on here. He said oh yah, just had a bit of a hard time breathing. He looked over and said Woohoo, and I yelled YAH! xD LEt's get goin! This ride was the funnest for Kc,because afterwards he wanted to go on it again, yet there was a longer line. Time FOR LUNCH! We all had to meet back with the clan.
Kc saw a Panda Express chinese food place on the way back, and was like, OMG I LOVE THERE ORANGE CHICKEN! I laughed, and said really? How about we tell everyone we wanna eat there? I looked at Andrea, who seemed fine with the idea. Kc said that his parents don't like chinese. Awww, well maybe I could still work something out, I whispered to him. His sister linked arms with me, and Andrea, and yelled at her brother KC too join us. He was looking at his map, since we were a bit lost. I yelled for him, and he turned around. I showed him my hand, and he gladly took it, his hand was a bit sweaty, but who cares. I was having so much fun.
When we all got back, KC's parents and my parents all agreed on Johny Rockets, a hamburger place. Kc looked down and said, I don't like hamburgers. His sister then told him, he can eat chicken there. He said he didn't know there was chicken, but wanted orange chicken. I told my parents I wanted to go someplace else with my friends, but they said no, his parents wanted this, and we're fine with it. I slumped my shoulders, and looked back at kc, and ran over to talk to him. I told him I will figure this out. He was confuesed, but understood what I meant later. We all had to wait for half an hour to get our food. Waiting at a table outside Johnny Rocket's. Kc's dad tried to buy me food, but I had to say no, they really didn't need to pay for me.
I got my father to take us to Panda Express, and KC went wild. He was so happy. I wasn't that hungry, so I split a chicken bowl with Andrea. Dad kicked me outta the line, since I was useless, so I waited. Then he called me back in to get a drink. I got a chocolate milk. Then my dad headed back to his cold tray back at johnny rockets. I waited for my buddies. We all had our food, and walked out, back towards Johnny's. I wanted to try some orange chicken, and Andrea was way ahead of me, but Kc offered me his. I took his fork, and got a piece, and tried it, it was delicious. He was right, it is the best chicken ever! I told him I did this change of food for him. He smiled, and was happy. I let him chug down the rest of my chocolate milk later, as a bonus. Lol.
So we all wanted to ride more rides, since nobody had a weak stomach, and after all, we had room for one or two more rides. I promised my brother and his friend we would ride the Evil knievil. So we went over to it, and stood in line. I was getting really hot. Kc kept looking through the holes of the wooden fence, and telling me he saw money, so I would look too. I was haivng so much fun. Then I asked Andrea how many seats this ride took, per person in one row. She said two. With that I looked at the ADHD crazy boy, and asked him who he'd like to sit with. He shrugged, and pointed a thumb sideways at me, and smiled a pleasing smile. I said, ok, I'd love to. So with that Andrea was fine with, and she sat with Jamie. My brother knew where he wanted to sit with his friend, so no minding him.
Finally we get up to the waiting lines, and me and kc pick the shortest waiting line. I was getting excited, and Kc talked to me about Stunt Man, and WHISKEY!!!!! xD I cracked up. Kc made me go first into the ride, since he was a gentleman, and so I went. The seatbelt confuesed me, and Kc, and then I noticed it was one big one, that went across both of us. He couldn't get it, which I have trouble with too, so I latched it on for both of us. Then I took my glasses off, and the seat bar came down. I was ready, WOO! He was too. We were skiddish in our seats, and I was happy. The ride started, and we were having so much fun. I screamed during the first few drops, and then KC and me both YELLED WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I lifted my arm up on a sharp turn, and BAM. My studded bracleet flies off. My eyes get bigger, and I reached for it, KC saw it flying away, and he said, WOAH THAT SUCKS, but we were too interested in the ride. I started cursing, and yelled HOLY MOTHER you know and all that, because that bracelet ain't cheap. I was spilling every emotion you could think of. I was jsut way to happy in the spur of it all. After the ride, Kc was like, man, I'm so sorry Alyssa, that's gotta suck! I was ok, I was with a person who loved me. I could care less of the damn bracelet. He looked for it though. I told him to jsut give up, and Andrea went to buy a water, I stole one when she did, and took a drink. Then KC was like really thirsty, and I offered him some, and he took some. Andrea didn't mind at all.
So the day was nearing towards in end. We had room for one more ride. Kc wanted the boss. I wanted the boss, so everyone else said, ok, If Alyssa's the birfday girl, and wanted to ride the boss, we're gonna ride the boss. I was happy. Me, MAtthew, and Kc raced for it, yet a security guard told us to slow down, and matt did before me, and I almost fell on him. We cracked up , the three of us, and found the Boss. Kc asked me who I wanted to sit with, and I knew who he wanted to sit with, and I said, with You, silly. He laughed, and was like, YAY! xD So we waited for 40 worthwhile minutes, for a two minute ride, that wouldn't take another item off of me. xD
Me and Kc sat in the second to last seat, me first, then him. The ride went on, and DAMN, DID I HAVE A KILLER TIME, WE ALL DID. I Screamed the rest outta me, and me and KC screamed at the same parts, same time, and Woo'd together. At the end, I asked kc if he had fun, and he was outta breath, wanted water. XD
Now we had to take Andrea home, since she had to work. Kc's family walked with us, and Kc was bummed that it was over already. I was too. I walked beside him for a while, with Andrea talking to his sister, she enjoyed them. He still had the energy in him, and I did too. I told him I wish I didn't have to go, and he asked me if I wanted to go in the gift shop with him. I couldn't since I was sunburnt a bit, and Andrea really had to get going. So we all shook hands, and Kc slowed down when he got to me, and I held my arms out, and he gave me a really nice hug. I mean, this was a NICE hug, not like a friendly hug, it was a loving FRIENDSHIP one. I knew he liked me. He almost didn't let go. XD Then his parents hugged me, told me it was a blessing to meet me all again. His sister said bye to me, hugged me, and then her friend did too. She happned to be wearing a hoody in which ANOTHER ALYSSA got her, (which was a cousin), what a coincidence! I was so happy. I had my wish come true.
Now I am able to go out in the world knowing there's people jsut like me who suffer differant disabilities. We all just have to find our true self. I found my true self with my friends, at Six Flags. It was a miracle to me. A WISH I MADE THAT REALLY CAME TRUE TOO. No lies. I hope I will see Kc again in my life. That was truly amazing.
Okay, so when we arrived there, Casey calls me, and is all like, where are you? I told him we were coming, he told me too look for a guy with a black shirt on, 5'11, and short brown hair. I said okay, and we hung up. I was looknig for him, and I looked right in front of me at the gates, and there he was in front of the fountain, waving straight at me, and I was like OMG, THAT's HIM! I was so happy too see him, it gave me funny feelings inside. Anyway , I get through, and Kc runs up beside me, and some guy wants to take our picture, so we let him, then we take a few for ourselves. I was so happy. I went over to see his family, and greeted them, my parents fine with the whole thing. The next thing that happened? Well, rides of course. xD
First ride we rode on was Batman. I sat in between KC and Andrea. So we had a blast on this ride. I found two pennies. I stuck my gum on the dull one, and added it to the gum board before we got on the ride. So much fun..next thing we all rode was the ninja. Kc rode in thr front passenger car, alone, while Andrea and I rode in the one behind him. We were in the first car. I was excited, yet knew my ears were going to be beaten up in this ride. xD before this ride happenned, Kc pointed out a guy that looked like Albert Einsten, and told me not to look to the right, and I looked to the right, and OMG a lady had sweaty boobs. xD I turned away, and was like, WOAH DAMN , and he told me, I told you not too look! xD I had so much fun, kc made me laugh so hard. During the time being at six flags. Time started flying by. With the long waiting lines.
Soon it got extremely sunny, and hot, yet the breeze was still going. I met up with kc's sister Jamie, and her friend. They seemed very kind. Not as bad as some other people I've met. I liked kc's family. They cared about me just as much as I cared bout them. Anyway, we all took some pictures, and decided on lunch. 1:30? sure. So we all agreed. Kc got his map out and we looked at the rides we could go on next. He wanted to ride the big white one, and I told him that's the Screaming Eagle. He was full of energy. So off we went, towards the screaming eagle.
He was being himself. I was open with him. I felt as if he knew what I gone through. We shared stories together, and he made me laugh easily. The way he looked at me, we could lock eyes. I was way too happy to be like this. It was more then I could ask for, a friend, for my birthday wish. A person who'd be there. A soul-mate just meant for me. I was happy it came true. He pointed out the misty spray thingy, and said MISTY THINGY! I thought the same thing. We raced over to it, and took a drink outta it, and then lost interest, and walked up the stairs leading to the Screaming Eagle. He yelled hi to people here and there, and I did the same. I loved his humor. I understood him, and he understood me. We changed the subjct a lot together, and had a conversation of changing subjects! Randomness rules, lol.
This time Andrea and I sat it the front. yet still in the first car. How lucky we were. Kc sat behind me, and poked my head, I couldn't reach back at him, darn revenge! xD The ride starts, and I looked back at kc, and he told me he had asthma. I felt worried. I told him my brother has it too, and asked if he'd be allright on here. He said oh yah, just had a bit of a hard time breathing. He looked over and said Woohoo, and I yelled YAH! xD LEt's get goin! This ride was the funnest for Kc,because afterwards he wanted to go on it again, yet there was a longer line. Time FOR LUNCH! We all had to meet back with the clan.
Kc saw a Panda Express chinese food place on the way back, and was like, OMG I LOVE THERE ORANGE CHICKEN! I laughed, and said really? How about we tell everyone we wanna eat there? I looked at Andrea, who seemed fine with the idea. Kc said that his parents don't like chinese. Awww, well maybe I could still work something out, I whispered to him. His sister linked arms with me, and Andrea, and yelled at her brother KC too join us. He was looking at his map, since we were a bit lost. I yelled for him, and he turned around. I showed him my hand, and he gladly took it, his hand was a bit sweaty, but who cares. I was having so much fun.
When we all got back, KC's parents and my parents all agreed on Johny Rockets, a hamburger place. Kc looked down and said, I don't like hamburgers. His sister then told him, he can eat chicken there. He said he didn't know there was chicken, but wanted orange chicken. I told my parents I wanted to go someplace else with my friends, but they said no, his parents wanted this, and we're fine with it. I slumped my shoulders, and looked back at kc, and ran over to talk to him. I told him I will figure this out. He was confuesed, but understood what I meant later. We all had to wait for half an hour to get our food. Waiting at a table outside Johnny Rocket's. Kc's dad tried to buy me food, but I had to say no, they really didn't need to pay for me.
I got my father to take us to Panda Express, and KC went wild. He was so happy. I wasn't that hungry, so I split a chicken bowl with Andrea. Dad kicked me outta the line, since I was useless, so I waited. Then he called me back in to get a drink. I got a chocolate milk. Then my dad headed back to his cold tray back at johnny rockets. I waited for my buddies. We all had our food, and walked out, back towards Johnny's. I wanted to try some orange chicken, and Andrea was way ahead of me, but Kc offered me his. I took his fork, and got a piece, and tried it, it was delicious. He was right, it is the best chicken ever! I told him I did this change of food for him. He smiled, and was happy. I let him chug down the rest of my chocolate milk later, as a bonus. Lol.
So we all wanted to ride more rides, since nobody had a weak stomach, and after all, we had room for one or two more rides. I promised my brother and his friend we would ride the Evil knievil. So we went over to it, and stood in line. I was getting really hot. Kc kept looking through the holes of the wooden fence, and telling me he saw money, so I would look too. I was haivng so much fun. Then I asked Andrea how many seats this ride took, per person in one row. She said two. With that I looked at the ADHD crazy boy, and asked him who he'd like to sit with. He shrugged, and pointed a thumb sideways at me, and smiled a pleasing smile. I said, ok, I'd love to. So with that Andrea was fine with, and she sat with Jamie. My brother knew where he wanted to sit with his friend, so no minding him.
Finally we get up to the waiting lines, and me and kc pick the shortest waiting line. I was getting excited, and Kc talked to me about Stunt Man, and WHISKEY!!!!! xD I cracked up. Kc made me go first into the ride, since he was a gentleman, and so I went. The seatbelt confuesed me, and Kc, and then I noticed it was one big one, that went across both of us. He couldn't get it, which I have trouble with too, so I latched it on for both of us. Then I took my glasses off, and the seat bar came down. I was ready, WOO! He was too. We were skiddish in our seats, and I was happy. The ride started, and we were having so much fun. I screamed during the first few drops, and then KC and me both YELLED WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I lifted my arm up on a sharp turn, and BAM. My studded bracleet flies off. My eyes get bigger, and I reached for it, KC saw it flying away, and he said, WOAH THAT SUCKS, but we were too interested in the ride. I started cursing, and yelled HOLY MOTHER you know and all that, because that bracelet ain't cheap. I was spilling every emotion you could think of. I was jsut way to happy in the spur of it all. After the ride, Kc was like, man, I'm so sorry Alyssa, that's gotta suck! I was ok, I was with a person who loved me. I could care less of the damn bracelet. He looked for it though. I told him to jsut give up, and Andrea went to buy a water, I stole one when she did, and took a drink. Then KC was like really thirsty, and I offered him some, and he took some. Andrea didn't mind at all.
So the day was nearing towards in end. We had room for one more ride. Kc wanted the boss. I wanted the boss, so everyone else said, ok, If Alyssa's the birfday girl, and wanted to ride the boss, we're gonna ride the boss. I was happy. Me, MAtthew, and Kc raced for it, yet a security guard told us to slow down, and matt did before me, and I almost fell on him. We cracked up , the three of us, and found the Boss. Kc asked me who I wanted to sit with, and I knew who he wanted to sit with, and I said, with You, silly. He laughed, and was like, YAY! xD So we waited for 40 worthwhile minutes, for a two minute ride, that wouldn't take another item off of me. xD
Me and Kc sat in the second to last seat, me first, then him. The ride went on, and DAMN, DID I HAVE A KILLER TIME, WE ALL DID. I Screamed the rest outta me, and me and KC screamed at the same parts, same time, and Woo'd together. At the end, I asked kc if he had fun, and he was outta breath, wanted water. XD
Now we had to take Andrea home, since she had to work. Kc's family walked with us, and Kc was bummed that it was over already. I was too. I walked beside him for a while, with Andrea talking to his sister, she enjoyed them. He still had the energy in him, and I did too. I told him I wish I didn't have to go, and he asked me if I wanted to go in the gift shop with him. I couldn't since I was sunburnt a bit, and Andrea really had to get going. So we all shook hands, and Kc slowed down when he got to me, and I held my arms out, and he gave me a really nice hug. I mean, this was a NICE hug, not like a friendly hug, it was a loving FRIENDSHIP one. I knew he liked me. He almost didn't let go. XD Then his parents hugged me, told me it was a blessing to meet me all again. His sister said bye to me, hugged me, and then her friend did too. She happned to be wearing a hoody in which ANOTHER ALYSSA got her, (which was a cousin), what a coincidence! I was so happy. I had my wish come true.
Now I am able to go out in the world knowing there's people jsut like me who suffer differant disabilities. We all just have to find our true self. I found my true self with my friends, at Six Flags. It was a miracle to me. A WISH I MADE THAT REALLY CAME TRUE TOO. No lies. I hope I will see Kc again in my life. That was truly amazing.
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