I've been suffering through knowing my father has Multiple Myeloma Cancer. I can't do anything but stay strong and break into tears when nobody knows. Its so painful to go on in life without a cop who stuck up for you and is..a father. I am adopted. To lose a loved one like this...is more hurtful than a heartbreak. I've been having trouble sleeping. Nobody understands really. Sometimes I try to talk but I BORE others. I end up crying. Being away from him...hes going to be in Hospital now. Stem cell transplant, bone marrow test, bloodwork, cell freeze treatment, and he will be in isolation. He is going to lose his hair, his whole immune system will be gone. I will not get to visit him again. I cry. He never asked for this. God help me, i pray everyday for him to be the cure. I wish he will survive. I am deeply depressed. I don't know how much longer I can hold in my emotions. Mom's stressed. I don't have a job and my dad is disabled. He lost his job. Hes such a strong man, hes never been sick before. Swear. He's always been healthy. This testing thing, all gonna happen on the same day. That day is this thursday, and he has terminal staged cancer, which cannot be put into remission. He's trying to fight it, but its maknig him weak. He falls into deep sleeps. I cannot explain everything. This is what my stress is built on. I wish my friends would help me.